Going through the adoption process can be one of the most rewarding, yet challenging, things your friends will go through. Adopting a child is a monumental step for anyone and is often a long process. If your friend is building his/her family through adoption, the one thing they will need more than anything is the support of their family and friends. Keep in mind, nobody expects your friend’s journey to also be yours, and you shouldn’t be worried about doing something wrong. Just be there. Any little thing you can do will be enough. Here are a few ideas:
Let them know that you believe in them.
Send a text or leave a voicemail letting your friend know that you’re thinking about them. A supportive social media post goes a long way, as long as they are public with their adoption journey. Better yet, sending snail mail will mean worlds to your friend. This is something that they will cherish during their journey and likely keep forever.
Do something small for them.
Parents going through the adoption journey are often overwhelmed. A new child is a huge change and can require a lot, if not all, of their attention. New parents will often not ask for help because they want to seem like they’ve got everything together as they adjust to life at home. Let them know that you are bringing them dinner and ask what day works best for them. Stop by with diapers or offer to help tidy the house during a time frame that works for them. These small acts of kindness are not small to your friend. They will appreciate anything you do.
Bring them something meaningful.
Being a new parent can be stressful in ways that you can’t prepare for, especially if you don’t have nine months to prepare, which often happens when adopting. If your friend has recently brought home a newborn, he/she is likely overwhelmed both emotionally and physically. Stopping by with a vase of flowers, coffee, or chocolates will be greatly appreciated. If you are someone who is artistically inclined, creating a painting or bringing by a homemade card is an incredibly thoughtful gift that your friend will love.
Just be there.
Waiting is a part of any adoption journey. The entire process of adoption doesn’t happen overnight and waiting is one of the hardest parts. Though many people are afraid of bothering adoptive parents by constantly asking for updates, your friendship is not a bother. Just stopping by every once in awhile and showing that you care will mean a lot.